Flashback Friday: Bad Hair

Alternate title: How my parents made sure I never had sex.

It’s been a long time since I’ve done a Flashback Friday. I’m really good at starting up recurring posts and then abandoning them completely. So it’s time to bring it back, even if just for one week because I’m almost certain I will regret this.

You might remember, I dyed my hair red last week. While I was dying it, I posted a picture on Instagram out of boredom.

Then I got a few comments.

Those comments made me think about how often I change my hair and all the terrible hair cuts I’ve had in the past. Today I’m going to share some of them with you. These are pictures of pictures so they aren’t the best quality, but if we’re being real here, no one needs to see these clearer than they already are. So get ready for some of the worst pictures ever taken of me. (You can thank my BF for digging some of these up.)

Lord help me if any of this ends up on People of Wal-Mart or Awkward Family Photos.

1. The Bowl Cut

My parents started me out pretty young with the terrible haircuts. Since I don’t remember going to the salon, I’m pretty sure an actual bowl was used in the making of this hair. If you stare long enough, I kinda look like Danny Bonaduce. (This picture is Pants approved, by the way.)

2. The Tight Perm

(This is for you, Verlin.)

I hated smiling because I had terrible teeth and was super embarrassed about them. I got this perm the summer before 8th grade. The first day of class, I walked in and Kris Winkle (yeah, I’ll call him out) said, “WHAT did you do to your hair!?” That pretty  much scarred me for the rest of the year.

3. The Feather

Mmm. I loooved having teeth like that growing up. Gave me so much confidence!

I remember my dad made me wear that dress and I hated it. I’m pretty sure this is the only time I wore it and I remember being thankful that I was still growing because I knew it wouldn’t fit for long. Dresses should not have bibs or look like couches. But I think we have other issues to deal with in this picture, like that blue eyeshadow.

4.  The Feathered Mullet

This might be one of my favorites. I like how the feathering really covers up my earlobes. Couldn’t someone at least have repainted my nails?

5. The Disheveled Mullet

That was my first and last trip to Fantastic Sams. My mom LOVED it. I was mortified. Even in the 80s. I cried after I got this hair cut and had to deal with it forever while it was growing out. I know you can’t tell from the picture, but that’s a Belinda Carlisle pin I’m wearing on my shirt. I couldn’t afford the t-shirt, so I bought the pin and wore it all.the.time.

6. The Teased Bangs

That’s me and Lisa. She is going to KILL me for posting this but how can I let such a treasure go unseen? That is the tight perm from the previous picture growing out. Not completely horrible, but you can’t deny the awkwardness of the spoon in my mouth, a happy face made out of Oreos in our ice cream, and my supremely comfortable hand pose.

7. The Scrunchie

Oh hey there attractive couch!

This was my matching phase. My earrings matched my scrunchie which matched my shorts. Not horrible, but very 80s. And now it reminds me of The Graduate.


So there you have it. I showed you mine, now you show me yours. Pretty please? Send me your worst hair cut picture at eatwatchrun@gmail.com (and your blog link if you have one) and I’ll put them in a post in a week or so. 🙂


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24 responses to “Flashback Friday: Bad Hair

  1. Lee

    All my bad hair pictures are at my mom’s house in Maryland! Can’t say I’m too upset about that.

    When I was in 7th grade, my dad made me get this awful cut with lots of short layers. I have curly hair. You can imagine.

  2. Nice pics. 🙂 And I kind of like the tight perm one. 😉 I rocked scrunchies, the Wave, and feathered hair myself. Sorry most pics are in storage right now due to our temporary living arrangements.

  3. theAlmostRunner

    Paula. OH, PAULA. Bless you.

    I do need to say that your hair in the blog header and on the sidebar are both FABULOUS, though.

  4. We definitely had ALLLL the same hair styles. But which picture to send to you — decisions, decisions….

  5. Man, I love this post. My mom rocked classic rod stewart hair for a solid 5 years..I will look through the archives for my bad hair pics. My mom gave me bangs that started half way back on my head…terrible.

  6. Suzanne

    This is like looking back at my own hair tragedies. But you are missing the side ponytail! That was one of my staples.

  7. I’m seriously crying. Tear streaming down my face. My trigger was the bib/smocked dress. I can’t express how much I love it and you for posting it.

    And I’m pretty sure you and I had the hairstyle for 99.9 percent of our childhoods. And the Belinda Carlisle pin? Dying laughing because I’m pretty sure I did the same thing with a NKOTB pin. Except rather than putting it on my shirts, it stayed on my purse strap for maybe 2 years of junior high.

    But now I just need to decide which one to send, too. I may put the burden of the choice on you and send you a couple options.

    You’re awesome.

  8. Kim

    Oh that made me laugh! 🙂 I did a similar post last Friday with the big hair of the early 90’s!

  9. Sara

    Thank God I have no pictures but… That bowl cut? That was my hair for several years. I hated it. The “salon” where my mom took me to get my hair done called it a “mushroom cut.” now that I think about it, it’s no wonder that I hate mushrooms.

  10. I’m pretty sure you’re going to see plenty of #4s at the concert tonight. Too bad you couldn’t bring that one back for the occasion.
    You’ve never had bad hair though until you’ve rocked the “college guy with curly hair spends all his haircut money on beer” ‘fro. ‘Twas a thing of beauty, it was.

  11. I like the perm! Who cares what Kris Winkle says!*

  12. i definitely thought that was head gear in that picture with the spoon in your mouth! that would have made it 10x better haha

  13. Oh Paula…hahaha. This is amazing. I was dying. I LOVE your haircuts! My hair has always just looked the same. Straight and flat. So I was jealous of your pics. But I did have some pretty attractive childhood photos

    Whose seductive gams are those on the couch?! Yowza.

  14. Amber K

    I’m going to have to dig through my old pictures, but I know I had the feathered mullet at one point too! Why my mother did that to me, I still don’t know, lol.

  15. This is one of my favorite posts, EVER!

  16. Sarah S

    This post is everything a blog should be. Mullets, head gear, and a scrunchie.

  17. This is maybe my favorite post of yours ever. And that’s saying a lot. Sweet Jesus. And thank you.

  18. Verlin

    Holy crap, that perm one is actually THE BEST hairstyle of the bunch. You’ve raised (or, I guess, lowered the bar). When I read Haley’s comment about the head gear, my friend in the office next to mine came over to see what all the laughing was about. I consider your Feathered Mullet to be the winner of the bunch — the bowl cut is a close second, but the chipped nail polish helps send the F.M. over the top. Well played.

  19. Best. Post. Ever. That is all!

  20. I definitely had the Scrunchie, Bowl Cut, and Tight Perm. I’m glad I wasn’t the only incredibly awkward kid growing up…

  21. Pingback: Moody | | Eat: Watch: RunEat: Watch: Run

  22. This is the best thing that I have read in a loooong time! LOVED, lalalaLOVED IT 🙂
    I laughed my face off because
    A. Those are some awesome haircuts!
    B. I am not alone!
    I had every single one of those hair cuts!! The bowl, the feather, the bad perm….ahhhh! I die!
    Next time I visit my mom I will search for the evidence!

  23. Pingback: Your Bad Hair (Part 1) | | Eat: Watch: RunEat: Watch: Run

  24. Seeing these makes me feel infinitely better about my own childhood haircuts. You just saved me serious cash on therapy 🙂

    Though I honestly think that looking back, the worst haircuts happened to the coolest most fashionable people. The problem is that hair fashion hit a serious rut for a few decades.

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