The Most Superficial Movie Review Ever

Last night, I went to see Les Mis.

I prefer this poster.

Now, before I tell you what I thought of the movie, keep this stuff in mind: I don’t normally like musicals, period pieces, movies that make me cry, or Russell Crowe. In fact, I hate movies that make me cry. So I usually avoid all romances and 50% of dramas. It’s not that I don’t like them, but the crying wipes me out. Then, when I go to sleep that night, my eyes get super puffy so when I wake up, I look like I’ve been in a bar fight. Those puffy eyes take hours to look like normal again. So all day long, people will tell me I look tired or ask me what’s wrong. And you can only tell people you got into so many bar fights until they don’t believe you anymore. So, I’d just rather avoid that all together.

Anyway, we went to the movie because we wanted to spend some time with friends we hadn’t seen in awhile and considering the trailer for it made me want to cry, I went in armed.

Oh, I should also tell you that I knew nothing about Les Mis before last night. I’ve never seen the play and I didn’t know the story. With that said, I thought the movie was good. Not great. I would have been happy to wait till video.

The cinematography was beautiful and Anne Hathaway and Hugh Jackman were amazing. There was almost no dialog – all the dialog was in song, which was different.  I believe this is the first movie where the actors sung their parts while filming the movie, instead of recording the soundtrack prior to filming and lip syncing and I think that really added to the emotion. However, I think the beginning of the story was way too rushed, but even so, I think the movie was too long.

I know what the Les Mis fans are thinking.

So as long as I got the Les Mis fans hating me, I might as well get all superficial too.

Russell Crowe singing was a little awkward to me. It’s not really a role I imagine him in. I couldn’t stop looking at Hugh Jackman’s tongue when he was singing (it’s so pink!), and I’m pretty sure Helena Bonham Carter is in this movie only because she got lost on the way to the set of her next Tim Burton movie. (I think all her roles can be described as “crazy lady with crazy hair.”) Then, this girl’s waist was so small that I couldn’t notice anything else in the scene.

I never thought I’d see a movie with Sacha Baron Cohen because he is the epitome of annoying to me. Although, he was pretty entertaining comic relief in this one and I sort of hated myself for liking him. Then, Sacha and Russell Crowe had a scene together and I wondered if Russell asked for extra money to do that. Then I wondered how Sacha scored a hot babe like Isla Fischer in real life. Then I wondered, “hey what’s for dinner?”

Overall, I liked it. The friends I went with that are super Les Mis fans said the movie wasn’t as good as the play or book but they still enjoyed it. So if you like all the things I mentioned that I hate, you will like it too. I’m sure this movie will get all the awards, so when you do see it you can feel more cultured and worldly like I do.


Filed under Uncategorized

24 responses to “The Most Superficial Movie Review Ever

  1. Ali

    Dude! I’m kinda dying to see this movie BECAUSE I’ve damn near cried at the previews. And I also have the same eye-swelling-crier problem, but I’m willing to suffer through it for this one.

    I didn’t realize they would be singing pretty much every word… so thanks for the heads up. I saw the version of this with Liam Neeson and it was actually pretty good but had plenty of real dialog. In fact, now that I think about it I don’t think it had ANY singing.

    Also didn’t know Mrs. Tim Burton and Sasha-Borat-Ali-G was in this, but on a more serious note: How the hell did he manage to not only marry, but knock up Isla Fischer?! I’ve wondered this for years.

    • Paula

      I didn’t even know there was a Liam Neeson version. I like him, I’m gonna have to check that out.
      And YES. Isla is a catch. It makes me think there might be something normal about him somewhere. Deep down. Deep, deep down.

  2. I will chime in here and say that normal people will think it’s a great movie–if they like musicals. All of the acting and singing was really well done and the cinematography was pretty amazing. Like, when Russell Crowe is standing over the water? Yeah. I was not thinking, “this looks so fake.” Yes, it was long, but if you actually saw it performed on Broadway, they would’ve had an intermission, which I think would’ve been a nice touch. On the other hand, I felt like I got my money’s worth–a whole extra hour of entertainment vs. a rom com that ends in 90 minutes.

  3. I’m a super Les Mis fan, but I had the same thoughts as you. Overall, I really liked it. I didn’t get too emotional because I’ve seen the play probably 5 times and know the music from start to finish so I already knew who was going to die and when.

    Anne Hathaway and Hugh Jackman are really good singers. Russell Crowe? Not so much.

    I also could not stop staring at Eponine’s waist, either. Totally distracting. I imagine her ribs are malformed or something.

    All in all, I really liked it, but without an intermission to get wine, it’s a wee bit long.

    • Paula

      Yes! I agree. Even my hubs said he would have rather seen it at home so he could get up and walk around half way through. 🙂 And by walk around, I mean get wine, of course.

  4. LOL. I love your review. So, you could follow it w/o knowing the story? Because I sure don’t.

    And LOL at your Helena Bonham Carter comment!!!

    • Paula

      I had to double check that the movie wasn’t directed by Tim Burton! 😉 I think it bothers me even more that they’re married and she’s only in his movies.

  5. Amber K

    I saw it live in the theater once, but I very much prefer the anniversary DVD they put out years ago and nothing can compare in my opinion. I still want to give this one a shot, but I think I’ll wait until Netflix has it.

  6. Ha! Loved this review:-)
    You keep it real my friend!
    Seeing it this weekend and I CAN NOT WAIT!
    I need to get it out of my system because my husband is damn near sick of me playing the soundtrack on repeat and belting the lyrics at the top of my lungs!

  7. Brandi

    Well if we are going to be superficial, I was really pumped to see it because I think Eddie Redmayne (Marius) is HOT. Im kinda obsessed. It’s terrible.

    Anna Hathaway was really good. I was pleasantly surprised. I’m also glad to know that I wasn’t the only one distracted by Hugh Jackmans very shiny pink tongue. Good lord. And Eponine…how is her waist that tiny? It didnt even look real!

    I loved it. But I’m also a theatre nerd. I love myself a musical. 🙂 and I love this review. You call it like you see it my friend 🙂

    • Paula

      Do you read Peanut Butter Fingers? Because Eddie Redmayne totally reminded me of a younger version of her husband. And LOL to the “shiny” pink tongue. Yes! That was what I was missing. It was so shiny too. I was mesmerized. But Hugh can do that to a girl.

  8. Jackie Smith

    I get angry when a movie makes me cry; so I also avoid “criers” like the plague…we went to see Django on Christmas day rather than Les Mis. I’m hoping you’ll do a movie review of that!

  9. Multiple reviews have said Russell Crowe is deadweight and wooden in Les Mis. I’m still dying to see it though! I don’t think I’ll be able to unsee that woman’s waist and will giggle during her scenes, which will be totally inappropriate.

  10. I like crying and I like musicals, so I guess this movie is right up my alley! In fact, my husband is a big fan of the musical. (He studied it in school.) We’d both love to see it, but I don’t think they are playing it here. I get the feeling that soldiers aren’t exactly the target audience, thus the reason they aren’t showing it on base.*

  11. I love musicals but for some reason I am not interested in this movie. I’ve heard good things about Les Mis though so maybe I’ll check it out when it hits dvd 🙂 I love your review btw!

  12. Ooooh great honesty! I know nothing about Les Mils but wanted to check it out because there’s so much talk about it. Thanks for this!

  13. Michelle

    Hahah. I am a crazy theatre nerd and loved reading this because so much is true. When Maruis offers to pay Epponine to find Cosette I turned to my roommate and said “He should pay her in sandwiches.” she was so. Tiny. I mean she’s supposed to be starving but woah.

    Overall I loved it but cried like a mofo. Les Mis was the first musical I ever saw at 11 and spurred a life long obsession with theatre so basically I was destined to love it as long as the didn’t f it up to much. (WHICH THEY ALMOST DID WITH RUSSELL CROWE.:))

  14. I’m still baffled by the whole Sacha and Isla pairing too. How does that happen?

  15. Cia

    i so agree with the waistline! i also couldn’t focus on anything else during that scene! such a scene-stealer!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s